Yesterday was a day I won’t soon forget. It was Valintines, but I didn’t get to spend more than a few text messages with mine. I woke up quite dehydrated, craving cigarette, to the sound of my phone ringing. Didn’t answer in time and so I listened to the voicemail, drank some water, grabbed some food sticks and got in the truck. We arrived in Olds before noon. I found my way to where I needed to be, to find myself being bombarded with bad news.
It was noon, and I was grumpy, annoyed, perhaps depressed? Went to the library, and that’s when my day got fucked up and hilarious.
As soon as I walked into the library I made my way to the bathroom, where when washing my hands a man walked in. He looked at me, stopped dead in his tracks, walked out and looked at the sign. He stared at me for a few seconds, so I said, “you’re in the right one.” He said, “Oh! Sorry!”
I went to look up my school requirements but all the computers were in use. I sat down at a table and tried to use the terrible internet on my phone. A very large woman came up to me and asked, “Are you a boy or a girl?” I said, “What the fuck do you think?” She said nothing and stood by me for an uncomfortably long time. She eventually walked away, slowly, pausing every few steps. I finally looked up at who I was trying to ignore. It was a woman with Down’s Syndrome… I felt awful! Her sad little eyes staring at me two tables down.
I decided I was in the wrong, put my phone down, and walked over. She was breathing heavily and looked like her head was about to explode into a tear filled Chernobyl style disaster. I said, “I’m a boy, and I’ve just quit smoking and it’s made me an angry person. I am sorry for snapping at you.”
She didn’t respond till she got her breathing under control and said, “Smoking is bad for you.”
I said, “I know, that’s why I quit.
There was an uncomfortable lull, and so I smiled and went back to my table and started writing down the information I needed. She came back over and stood uncomfortably close. I looked up and she was smiling and staring. She said, “You have pretty hair.”
I said, “Thank you, I like your sweater.” This was more or less a lie. It was amusing, because it was Nascar, but therefore was also hideous. She continued to smile and then started giggling and asked me, “Do you wanna be my boyfriend?”
I started to feel my face flush, and was trying to think of what to say that wouldn’t hurt her feelings.”I’m not from here. I am just here for work and then I’m going back home.”
“I could come with you… I just have to tell my mom first.”
I was getting pretty irritated and decided that the truth couldn’t hurt in this situation so I said, “I actually have a boyfriend back home.”
She looked pretty dejected and stepped back(thank god) and started mumbling and looking around, and then quietly said, “faggot.”
Then she screamed it!
I was shocked and a bit embarrassed and started looking around for any sign of a care giver/beast handler, but didn’t see anyone who seemed to fit the bill. And so I asked her, “Please leave me alone, you are being very rude.”
She kept saying faggot and walked away. I was hoping this interaction was over and was praying it would start raining cigarettes, unfortunately neither were so.
A few minutes went by and one of the librarians came up to me and said that “Daphne” had said I had been rude to her, and that they would appreciate it if I packed up my things and left.
I was considering it but then decided that this was the time to stand up for myself! And so I said, “Did you not hear her just scream ‘faggot’ at me? She asked me to be her boyfriend, I tried to let her down easy, but that didn’t work so I told her that I have a boyfriend, and she got quite offensive. She has been rude and I want an apology.”
Daphne was standing behind the nearest shelves and looked and sounded like she was about to hurt someone, and so I asked quietly if I should go and come back later? Or am I banned or something?
The librarian said that it was in my best interest to avoid Daphne as she’s just a bit off. She squeezed my hand and winked and then went over to distract Daphne while I made my escape.
And escape I did… To the nearest convenience store where I was reunited with my precious Belmonts
Okay,
